I tested again this morning. Still light but still positive and pink! I need to be patient and realize it's still only 10dpo! I should be happy to have any line at all this early.
So far, it is all still sinking in. It doesn't feel real and I still don't believe it.
And by far, the hardest part, is posting my results for all the ladies on my discussion boards/groups. These are women that have supported me when I was sad, angry, jealous. Now I am posting my positive and I know, even behind the congrats, there is hurting. And I hate that I am a part of that. Right now I feel like I'm stuck in between...no longer TTC, but not pregnant enough to talk about much of anything except sheer excitement as well as panic.
Amidst all the anxiety, somewhere deep down there is a calm. I had a good feeling about this month and I really have a good feeling about the whole thing. I feel like this is truly our rainbow baby. I pray that I am right!
That being said, I don't plan to end the blog here. But, I do understand if there are those that choose to unfollow (even though I'd lovefor you all to stay). I know just how hard it is to watch someone experience what you so desire. I am by no means out of the woods, so the blog will continue to include my pregnancy fears as well as my feelings coming from past experiences; and new feelings and events going forward.