17 Days...

So I've had a few days for things to sink in. And yes, I'm excited for surgery. Well...as excited as one can be to go under the knife. As I've told DH, I'm in constant pain and I'm so sick of it. Surgery is the promise to make that pain go away, even though I know that it will get worse before it gets better. I'm also praying it improves our chances of conceiving once I'm recovered...then...Femara!!

I had the same surgery back in 2005. I was promised that I'd be able to return to work in 3-5 days. I ended up missing 2 weeks of work. I have always been a slow healer, and the recovery was more painful than I anticipated. I will have incisions (I had 4 last time)...and the pushing, pulling, and excising needed to remove the endometriosis is in fact going to cause pain afterwards. I know I can deal with it though. I've been through a lot since I last had this surgery. I've had multiple occurrences of kidney stones, including one that had to be removed surgically...followed by removal of a uretal stent while I was awake (it seriously felt like my insides were being ripped out through my urethra!). I've been through a natural miscarriage (painful physically and emotionally) at 11 weeks; followed by a D&C...then another early miscarriage.

I remember when I went for surgery in 2005, I was scared to death. That was my first major (to me, anyway) surgery...I was even scared of the IV. I started crying when the nurse was preparing to put that in. Now, I'm so used to having IVs everytime I go to the ER with a kidney stone. In fact, an IV usually gives relief to my pain, so I can look at it now like it's nothing!

I know they will give me some happy, floaty drugs prior to surgery through the IV. They make me feel like I'm floating on a cloud...seriously, I act so drunk once they shoot that stuff in. I have no idea what it's called, but it takes all my cares away.

But mostly, I'm just so happy to have the doctor that I do. He has such a positive outlook. He's seen so many patients with similar issues that wanted nothing more than to have a baby; and he's worked through their problems and given them their dream. I can say this because I have lots of friends and acquiantances that went to see him and they all have kids now. He just has a way. He acts like he truly cares, and I ultimately feel like it's because he really does!

I've already started a countdown...17 days! I'm still waiting on a time...I'm praying it's early in the morning. I don't do so well without eating and I know I won't be able to eat at least 8 hours prior to surgery. My follow-up is August 23rd at 3:45 (13 days post surgery). I've also already spoken to the HR lady where I work and my boss and I know I'm taking the day of surgery (Aug 10) and the entire next week...and probably at least half of the week after (if not the entire week...just have to see how I feel).

I've started making a list of things I want to have done prior to surgery including laundry, dishes, and making sure the house is clean and dusted. I want fresh sheets on the bed and clean towels in the bathroom. I already turned the nightstand sideways so I can reach the drawer without having to sit up...I already started storing pills and remote controls in there. And since the table is sideways now, I have more room to put things on it and still be able to reach them while laying down. Also, since we have a log bed, we can store things on top of the logs on the top two corners. My ipad fits perfectly on one and I can put books and magazines on the other! I still need to move my ipad cord so I can charge it while in bed.

I also need to fill the prescription for Vicodin that the doctor gave me so I have it ahead of time (even though I already have a stash of Vic's and Tramadols from endo pain and kidney stone pain). I ordered the "Ultrasoft Sleepshirt" from Victoria's Secret to wear to and from the hospital. Last time I wore flannel PJ pants and the waistband was awful...so, no waistband this time. I plan to wear slip-on sandals.

I also need to buy Gas-X (for the shoulder pain), stool softener (nothing worse than being constipated with abdominal incisions), prune juice and Activia yogurt (I soooo don't want to be constipated, can you tell?), magazines to read, movies (even though we already have a ton)...and maybe a bell to make DH run up and down the stairs (hahah, just kidding on the last one...I'll use my phone and text him) :)

So, I'm ready. Time to hurry up and wait some more!