The last couple weeks, my thoughts have been consumed with fear. The farther along I get with this pregnancy, the more anxious I become. It's all becoming so real, and now, the thought of something going wrong would seriously destroy me. I'm trying to remain strong...but in the back of my mind, that thought is always there. What if.
I know everything has checked out perfect with baby so far, but I can't help but worry. Right now I'm focusing on making it to 24 weeks (viability). But then what? I honestly think I will still worry even when I make it to that point.
I broke down crying to DH over the weekend because the feelings had begun to overwhelm me. I just couldn't hold it in any longer. Just scared of everything. Of him being OK and making it here safely to my arms. Then taking care of him and worrying about being a good mom. But it ultimately came down to the fear of losing another one. The odds are pretty good that everything will be fine, but that fear still exists within me and I can't seem to shake it.
Please tell me this is normal. Perhaps for every mom...but maybe even more so for those that have experienced a loss. How do I deal with this?